Cruel and Unusual Punishment
(A Fantasy)

The plane crashed into the mountainside
in my dream that was real as could be.
Thank God, there were just three folks who died,
Tom Cruise, Tom Selleck and me.

Together we showed at the judgment bar,
Tom Cruise, Tom Selleck and me.
The keeper said, “You’re together thus far,
now come follow me, you three.”

We followed him in a long narrow hallway,
Tom Cruise, Tom Selleck and me.
Until he opened and stood in the doorway
of a room that was awful to see.

The walls were jet black. It was small, without view;
the furniture black, with no pad.
One beam of dim light shined unsteadily through,
and no creature comforts it had.

The ugliest woman I ever did see
was crouched there without signs of mirth.
Our guide said, Tom Cruise, here you’ll spend eternity
to pay for your sins while on earth.”

The guide then led Tom Selleck and me
to a room and a woman like the first.
“Tom Selleck,” he said, “here you’ll spend eternity
to pay for your sins while on earth.”

Far down the long hallway, the guide then led me
to a room that was spacious and bright,
with drapes as pretty as could possibly be,
and shadow less, natural light.

There were soothing pastels that could turn any head;
the view was an eye-popping show.
And, there on a soft, warm and comfortable bed
sat beautiful Marilyn Monroe.

The guide turned from me and looked at Marilyn
as he said with apparent chagrin,
“My dear, to pay for your earthly sin,
you must spend eternity with him.”
© 1998, cbs

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